Marriage Advice from the Women Who’ve Been There & Back [Part 2]

Marriage Advice from the Women Who’ve Been There & Back [Part 2]
  • You have to know who you are as a man/woman and as a person before you commit a lifetime to someone else.
  • Mental stimulation can’t die out. You have to aim at stimulating the other person intellectually.
  • Men and women can still lie, that ring doesn’t mean anything if you can’t trust the person from the beginning; marriage does not unfortunately equal loyalty.
  • Don’t forget to date the person, even when you’re married. You’ll always love each other, but you have to work on continuing to like each other. You have to wake up everyday and continue to choose your relationship- on some days, that choice is easier than others.  Don’t let kids, work and life stop you from taking your spouse out. Believe it or not, when the kids grow and move out, only you and your spouse will still remain- memories and all.
  • Make sure you have differentiated whether the person has active potential or seen potential: choose active potential always, it’ll save you in the long run.
  • You can’t change anyone, so don’t go in thinking that you can.
  • Be best friends first; having a solid foundation is key.
  • Leave your family out of your business, unless it’s absolutely necessary. You will forgive your spouse, but they may not. Better yet, don’t let anyone into your business, it’s between you and your partner. Everyone doesn’t need to know what’s going on in your household.
  • Never think that you will get what you need from someone after you say I do, if you weren’t getting it before you said I do. If you allowed them to continue, don’t expect your partner to change certain behaviors that you had an issue with before you got married. Ask for what you need from your partner the moment you notice something may cause an issue for you in the relationship.
  • Be willing to be honest and transparent.
  • Don’t be unequally yoked. Keep God first. You can’t be scared of putting your spouse second, after God. You must have your own personal relationship with God. You can never stop praying for your person, no matter how hard it gets. If you have a true relationship with God, your spouse should too.
  • Your vision and his purpose must be intertwined. Don’t think alike, think together.
  • Don’t deprive your partner of sex. One woman described it as holding the cookie hostage; the longer you hold it, the sooner his hands will end up in another jar- for our younger readers: whatever that means, right!. Moving on, another person added how being physically intimate, even when you don’t feel like it, is a good for the relationship because it’s how men communicate, which will ultimately translate into verbal communication, pleasing both people.
  • Make sure your spouse is crazy about you before you marry him. Settling for you simply will not last. If you’re a woman, make sure he loves you a little more than you love him because believe it or not, women adapt more than men do.
  • What you think is external, really is internal.

For those who are yet to read Part 1, here you go, courtesy of us: Marriage Advice Part 1

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